Kate Crowhurst
Bite-Size Read:
- We feel like we can talk to our best friends about anything.
- However, it can be difficult to navigate how to talk to your friends about money.
- These money do’s and don’ts will help you support your friends to live their financial best life.
Our friends are the family we choose for ourselves.
A good friend is worth their weight in gold. We catch up with our friends and in doing so learn more about ourselves and who we want to be. Through meaningful conversations, our friends help us find purpose and meaning in what we do. These conversations can help both people in a friendship grow and develop over time.
Not all of us feel like we can talk to our friends about money.
Money is an awkward topic to talk about in any relationship, including a friendship. However, if your friends can make you into a better person, think about what that might mean for your financial future if you started to talk to your friends about money. We’ve crafted some money do’s and don’ts to help you support your friends to achieve their financial goals.
Here’s how to talk to your friends about money:
1. DO remember comparison is the thief of joy
You are on your own path with money and your friend is on their own path, not yours. Compare yourself only to where you were in the path and how far you’ve come in your money journey.
2. DON’T make excuses to not talk about money
It will always be hard to talk about money if you’ve never talked about it before. We are conditioned to not talk about money so breaking this barrier is difficult. Persist and eventually, talking about money will feel more natural to you.
3. DO start the conversation
You can’t expect your friend to be the one who starts talking about money if you aren’t prepared to also start the conversation yourself. Lead by example and bring it up the next time you see them in a non-confrontational way to start the conversation topic.
4. DON’T pretend you know everything
You’re not expected to be a financial expert and there will be things you don’t know. Be upfront about what you do and don’t know so that you can learn together.
5. DO focus on money topics rather than figures
People feel very weird in talking about figures like their salary. You may find it easier to focus on money topics rather than exact figures, particularly early in these conversations.
6. DON’T ignore the person you’re talking to
If you’re wondering how to talk to your friends about money, remember one thing: it is always a conversation. A quality conversation means listening to what the other person is saying, including when they want to end the conversation. Pay attention to your friend, what they’re saying and their body language.
7. DO talk about your financial goals together
We all have financial goals we want to reach in the future. Share your financial goals with your friends and support each other to achieve them. That could include going round to each other’s houses to catch up over home cooked meals rather than expensive meals out if you’re trying to save money.
8. DON’T make assumptions about your friend’s finances
People come from different backgrounds and are raised with different experiences of money. As a friend, your role is to listen and not assume. Instead, ask questions to learn more about what they are comfortable to share and support your friend.
9. DO celebrate their financial wins
Friends uplift us so lead by example in celebrating your friends and their financial wins. Toast their promotion, reaching their savings goal or building a house deposit.
10. DON’T judge your friend
Many of us are guilty of judging our friends, knowingly or otherwise. Friendships require positive words to build familiarity so be aware of your judgement kicking in and how it might affect the conversation. Your role as a friend is to support them to reach their goals, removing judgment from the conversation.
Do you talk to your friends about money?
Our friends are there for us through so much of our lives and can make us better people. If you can start learning how to talk to your friends about money, you are better placed to support your friend to achieve financial freedom and also progress your own financial goals.
